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So, I'm back at Belhaven. And benatlpc no longer applies.
I'll be back at pianoben. Take care.
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| Tomorrow begins my set of lasts here at Lagniappe this summer: my last Saturday of work; my last Sunday worship service; my last Monday night Bible study; my last Tuesday to watch cabbage ball; my last Wednesday night off with the other terns; my last evening to endure Texas Thursday; and my last Friday to wake up to the end of a work week.
*sigh*
People have asked me recently, "What can we pray for you as you return home?"
If I have learned anything this summer it is this: I am more sinful than I can ever imagine, and Christ is the Savior I need in light of it. Lagniappe has become a catalyst for me seeing my sin. Every day I am put in situations that bring out my pride and my arrogance and my selfishness. So, as I move back to Jackson, and I get back to Belhaven, this would I ask for in prayer: That God would continue to reveal my sinfulness to me. And in that, He would reveal the greatness of His Son to me.
My sin and my Savior--that is all I have. And brokenness is the way I see both.
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Continual Repentance, Valley of Vision
"O God of Grace,
Thou hast imputed my sin to my substitue,
and hast imputed his righteousness
to my soul,
clothing me with a bridegroom's robe,
decking me with jewels of holiness.
But in my Christian walk I am still in rags;
my best prayers are stained with sin;
my penitential tears are so many impurity;
my confessions of wrong are so many
aggravations of sin;
my receiving the Spirit is tinctured with
selfishness.
I need to repent of my repentance;
I need my tears to be washes;
I have no robe to bring to cover my sins,
no loom to weave my own righteousness;
I am always standing clothed in filthy garments,
and by grace am always receiving change of
raiment,
for thou dost always justify the ungodly;
I am always going into the far country,
and always returning home as a prodigal,
always saying, Father, forgive me,
and thou art always bringing forth
the best robe.
Every morning let me wear it,
every evening return in it,
go out to the day's work in it,
be married in it,
be wound in death in it,
stand before the great white throne in it,
enter heaven in it shining as the sun.
Grant me never to lose sight of
the exceeding sinfulness of sin,
the exceeding righteousness of salvation,
the exceeding glory of Christ,
the exceeding beauty of holiness,
the exceeding wonder of grace."
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"Remember the Gospel, it is the only thing we have to cling to. We can't make this work--we will fail miserably. only God can make it work."
Even though this was said directly to a certain situation, is it not completely true about our walk in this world? The idea that I must cling to nothing but Christ and His Gospel is baffling. If that is true it means that I have no hope in clinging to my self. My exalted view of myself must be smashed so that I can be led to Christ. Rev. James Holland says, "there is no salvation apart from brokenness."
In a prayer group recently, someone asked for prayer for brokenness to come to him. I think that is a prayer we should all take part in. It is the scariest thing we can ask for, brokenness is. But when brokenness comes we see Christ for who He is and we see the uncontainable love of God washing over our smashed selves.
Pray with me for brokenness, friends.
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At one of our first Bible studies with Jean this summer we talked about the law and grace in reference to Galatians and Paul's addressing the Judaizers. Jean asked us this questions, "What is the one work that God requires of us?" None of us could answer him off the top of our heads, and it provided for a nice little pause. He pointed us to this passage:
"Then they said to him, "What must we do, to be doing the works of God?" Jesus answered them, "This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent." (John 6:28-29; ESV)
Although I don't read it often, I like the way the New Living Translation puts this particular passage:
"They replied, "What does God want us to do?" Jesus told them, "This is what God wants you to do: Believe in the one he has sent."
Did you catch it? Jesus tells us that we must believe in Him--the one God sent. The one thing I want to do is yell, "No! Faith! Not works! God requires no work on my part to receive salvation! And that is true, no work on my part can earn me salvation, but God still requires belief. Go to Ephesians 2 where it says that faith is a gift from God, so that we cannot boast in ourselves. God gives us faith so that we might believe.
What I want to get at is the idea that if we were to truly believe in Christ and His Gospel, our entire world view would change. Every action we would take would be affected. The way we look upon our day when we wake up; the way we meet new people; even the way we use our time--all of it would be transformed if we wholly believed in Jesus.
Father, forgive my unbelief.
Another thing I've had on my mind from Bible study recently is this quote:
"If we only deal with self control, patience, etc. we don't get Jesus--we only become more guilty."
We were discussing the law again, and the question of our keeping the law came up. Jean made it clear to me for the first time that the law shows us our sin and takes us to Christ, who did keep the law. But what hit me more is exactly what it says above: if we focus on keeping the law--the self control and the anger and the patience--we only condemn ourselves. We continue to show that we cannot keep the law and continue to seek salvation in our keeping the law. What we do not realize is that, in redemption, we are holy as we can ever be. "We are to live today in the light of tomorrow--in Christ." This, however, does not mean we are to live recklessly. As God works faith and belief in us, we are moved more and more to imitate Christ and our faith is seen in how we live. See James: "Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works." (2:18)
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